Abigail's Anxieties

Feeling guilty for being chronically ill... But should I be? So in case you're new to this blog, I'm chronically ill in a few ways. A full list of medical conditions is as follows: Generalised anxiety disorder (GED) Moderate depression Asthma Fibromyalgia Costochondritis And unfortunately having the mix of all of these means that there are and many things I'm unable to do, not only for myself but for others around me. For example, I would often like to be able to carry things for my mum, but because of my fibromyalgia, I can't carry much with the pain in my back, shoulders and arms. I'm always being told it's okay that I can't do things like that, but it still doesn't suppress the guilt in me, especially when I see people struggling with something. As I write this, I'm in the tail end of a fibromyalgia and costochondritis flare-up. 24 hours ago I was in such pain that I just wanted to, unfortunately, end it all. I was also bu...

Dear body, why are you working against me? Do you ever feel like something or someone is working against you? Like it/they don't want you to do well or succeed in life? And that it/they will do anything to get in your way? Well, I feel like that right now. And this thing that's getting in my way? My own body. It started when I was diagnosed as asthmatic  which affects me a lot with physical exercise e.g. walking around and extream weather such as very hot and very cold affect my breathing so I have to use my inhaler but I've had it for so long I'm used to it. Then October 2017 happened and I developed costochondritis which I still have to this day. Most cases sort themselves out in less than a year or at least improved. My case has gotten worse over the past near year and my day-to-day life is affected. I have to take multiple breaks during the day just to give my body a chance to recover. I have to use so much more energy just to get through the pa...