Abigail's Anxieties

Yeah, I'm 21 and use a walking stick. So what? When you think of the usual person that uses a walking stick on a daily bases, I don't think that a 21-year-old university student who dresses in vintage style clothing is the first image that comes to mind. But it doesn't have to be, because I have in fact put that image just below for you. Here's the thing, for me, using a walking stick is part of my daily life, You see, I'm currently in the process of being diagnosed with fibromyalgia (in fact as I write this, I'm just over a week away from going to a rheumatology appointment to have some tests done to hopefully get a definitive diagnosis so I finally know what's going on) and my god do I have a lot of pain. My pain is all over my body but the number of intense pain points I have in my body is, in my opinion, stupid. Let's go through the list shall we: -neck -spine -right shoulder joint -left wrist (thank god I...

Dear world,  please believe me when I tell you I'm ill. I know, I know. Looking at me from the outside I look like a relatively healthy 20-year-old woman. I don't look particularly overweight, I'm taller than the average woman but nothing too notable.  But what I need you to understand, world, is that what you see is a one-second snapshot of my life.  What you don't see is the confusion, the anxiety, the lack of motivation, the lack of emotion and the stress in my brain.  You don't see the night before where I was lying in bed wondering if it was worth getting up the next day just to go back to bed, to get up again, to go to bed again...  You don't see just how many thoughts are going through my head at any one time.  You don't see me crying, holding myself and sometimes unable to make a single noise as I try to understand what is going on around me while whatever is around me is making no effort to try and understand...